I have been in a long-term relationship that has caused me a lot of anxiety. The other half of this relationship gives me mixed messages: I want to help, but I don?t; I want to be there, but I don?t; yes/no; in/out. What?s a guy to do? I have been in this relationship for thirty years and I find myself no longer able to believe my ?partner?s? promises to ?be there? anymore.

The relationship of which I speak is not with a lover or a friend. I am writing about my relationship with my local visual arts community?rather, a certain part of that community?a not exactly homogeneous group of visual artists. And who are the artists of whom I speak? They are social. They believe in collective strength. They are serious about the development of their visual art careers and they seek advancement. The final characteristic by which I would characterize these artists is the sense of frustration that permeates their conversations with me. They have the talent with which to achieve greater success but they cannot get the exposure, sales and recognition they feel they deserve.

I am a visual art consumer of the first order. I buy work frequently, visiting artists in their studios and buying directly from them. I always buy work by ?emerging? artists. I love going to galleries?it is my favourite thing to do with a new friend. Walking through a gallery and seeing what emerges from my companion is like administering a Rorschach test for us both. My passion for visual art and life-long advocacy of it, has taken various forms. I started Presentation House Gallery on its photographic path, and on behalf of Opus, I ?invented? this newsletter with David van Berckel.

I co-founded the Alliance for Arts and Culture, paying particular attention to establishing policies that supported the visual arts, which was an under-represented discipline in the organizational stages of the agency. And I devoted eighteen intense months to reviving the Artropolis Society and to Artropolis 2001. All this work is what I think of when I self-identify as an advocate.

No professions make my life more worthwhile than stage actors, writers and visual artists. It doesn?t matter to me a bit whether I like their work or not. If they are one of these kinds of artists, I admire and respect them?even better when I like them and/or their work. So all the ?advocacy? work I have done has been a function of the esteem I have for artists. And I still want to do more. That is why I proposed to Opus that they host the public meeting that was held at the H. R. MacMillan Space Centre (Planetarium) on January 26th, 2005.

I proposed the meeting because of two issues: Artropolis is in need of significant support from the community it purports to serve, and there was ?new money? on the horizon, money that is ?pre-Olympic? in nature. Artropolis exhibitions have been, for decades, the collective effort of choice for the community of visual artists I tried to describe above. The ?pre-Olympic? funding programs are the largest source of new money for the arts in BC that I can remember for a long, long time, and the terms and conditions associated with these programs reflect the increased sophistication of government cultural planners.

The meeting, I was hoping, would bring ?the community? together to rethink how they collectively advance themselves. And further, that Artropolis would offer its name, history and non-profit society as the ?agency of record? for whatever the collective chooses to do. The BC government?s pre-Olympic funding programs were relevant to the discussion because they represented a potential source of funding for whatever collective initiative was proposed. At the end of the meeting, however, I was left with two strong impressions: the clear need for leadership, and the ?mixed messages? I have received before from this community I care so much about and want to help.

The last time I hosted an Opus-sponsored public meeting for artists, it was 2001 and I was prepared to ?lead the fight? to rebuild Artropolis. I found a lot of support from the community at that meeting, but the community was ?lucky? to have me??lucky? in that I had the right experience for the job plus I was prepared to work full time for eighteen months with no pay and to offer my office as the Artropolis office. The community is not in the same position today. It needs a leader who will find his or her own salary or, like me, work for nothing. That is not an easy role to fill. But it was clearly stated at the meeting by an astute participant: there is a need for decisive leadership in our community. And I can?t provide it again.

As for the issue of ?mixed messages,? virtually everyone raised their hand when asked if they wanted collective initiatives such as Artropolis shows to continue, so the meeting concluded with an invitation to everyone who raised their hand to write to me to indicate their interest in the administrative side of developing a large public exhibition strategy, or to register their interest in defining the artistic objectives for the exercise. So far, virtually every message repeats the sender?s offer to help, but then goes on to say how busy they are and that they can only donate so many hours. And this is what happened to a lot of those who initially volunteered in 2001. What I learned then, and what the current crew at Artropolis knows only too well?everyone wants in the show, but few, few are willing to do the work.

Honestly, I am not optimistic about the potential for our community to find a leader plus enough artists (who have to come from the Lower Mainland) with enough time available to make a success of a new collective initiative. I will continue to receive emails offering some support and time from those attending the meeting I am sure, and I will continue to collate the responses. I will also stay in touch with the Artropolis Society and report back on the meeting?s issues in this newsletter when there is something of significance to say. What is most important is leadership. The ship currently has no captain and that is the greatest need this community has. So the email I would most value will say, ?I can help, I have lots of free time to offer, and I am willing to lead the community in defining its future.? Am I going to hear from you?